Friday, May 14, 2010

Susahnya menjaga hati ............




An article that was sent to my mail box today. Sent by my SIL, Shina. The original source of this article is unknown. I thought it is worth sharing ....

Susahnya menjaga hati. Sedangkan ia adalah tempat pandangan Allah swt. Ia merupakan wadah rebutan di antara malaikat dan syaitan. Masing-masing ingin mengisi. Malaikat dengan hidayah, syaitan dengan kekufuran. Bila tiada hidayah, ada ilmu pun tidak menjamin dapat selamat, sekalipun ilmu diperlukan. Susahnya menjaga hati. Bila dipuji, ia berbunga. Terasa luar biasa. Bila dicaci, aduh, sakitnya. Pencaci dibenci. Bahkan berdendam sampai mati. Bila berilmu atau kaya, sombong mengisi dada. Jika miskin atau kurang ilmu, rendah diri pula dengan manusia. Adakalanya kecewa. Kemuncaknya putus asa. Pada takdir yang menimpa, kita susah untuk redha. Ujian yang datang, sabar tiada. Jiwa menderita. Melihat kelebihan orang lain, hati tersiksa. Kesusahan orang lain, hati menghina. Bahkan terhibur pula. Suka menegur orang, tapi bila ditegur hati luka. Aduh, susahnya menjaga hati. Patutlah ia dikatakan raja diri. Bukankah sifat sombong pakaian Raja?! Bukan mudah menahan marah apabila orang marah kepada kita atau orang membuat kesalahan kepada kita. Bukan mudah tidak membalas terhadap orang yang menganiaya dan memfitnah kita. Sedangkan mereka menyusahkan kita, dan kita pun menderita dibuatnya. Tidak mudah menahan perasaan hati agar tidak berbunga ketika ada orang memuji kita. Apakah kita boleh menolak pujian itu dengan rasa hati bahawa kita tidak layak menerimanya? Tidak mudah, biasanya hati sedap dan berbunga rasanya. Apabila kita berhadapan dengan orang serba istimewa, ada yang kaya, berjawatan tinggi, tinggi ilmunya sedangkan kita orang biasa saja, biasanya kita inferiority complex dibuatnya, malu pun timbul. Dapatkah kita merasa biasa saja, tidak terasa apa-apa? Tidak mungkin, bukan? Hati tetap akan terasa. Apakah mudah hati kita menahan derita bila mendapat bala bencana? Tidak mudah, biasanya hati kita derita dibuatnya. Kita rasa kecewa, kita rasa kitalah orang yang malang hidup di dunia. Kita tidak dapat hubungkaitkan bala bencana dengan hikmah dan didikan Tuhan kepada kita. Bahkan biasanya selalu saja jahat sangka dengan Tuhan yang melakukannya. Hati kita rasa bahawa tidak semestinya Tuhan menyusahkan kita. Begitu jugalah kalau kita orang istimewa, berilmu, berjawatan tinggi, kaya! Biasanya rasa megah datang tiba-tiba, sombong pun berbunga, mulailah kita menghina. Hidup kita pun mulailah berubah, sebelumnya beragama, boleh lupa agama. Kalau dahulu dapat bergaul dengan orang biasa, sekarang kawan kita golongan atasan sahaja . Hendak bergaul dengan orang biasa seperti dahulu rasanya jatuh wibawa. Begitulah hati manusia sentiasa berubah-ubah apabila berubah keadaan. Susahnya menjaga hati. Namun itu cuma soal hati, mainan hati, mainan perasaan. Yang penting kita dengan Tuhan ada hubungan senantiasa, takut dan cinta. Bila hati terasa bahagia dengan Tuhan, rasa senang dengan-Nya, yang lain-lain tidak ada arti apa-apa.Karena itulah kita disuruh berdoa: “Ya Allah tetapkanlah hati kami di atas agama-Mu, dan mentaati-Mu.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Allah tidak menganiayai mereka, akan tetapi merekalah yang menganiayai diri mereka sendiri."
{Surah Ali Imran : 117}

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Chronology kehidupan......



This is an e-mail conversation which I had with my eldest sister who is in Bangkok following her husband who is on a diplomatic mission there. She is not only a sister, she is a friend. A good one, indeed. I love talking to her sebab she is very practical, very easy. Her mind is always full of wise and interesting views. Her practicality can at times makes all your worries, all your troubles seems so far away... seems nothing. And as if you only worry and troubled yourself for no reason.... She is only a year plus older than me, so ikut chronology kehidupan, we are close. We should be.... Tapi kakak aku ni, masa kami kecik2, dia garang. My other sis, Haiza can testify to that. Ok, back to the e-mail conversation. I am going to reproduce the conversation as an article (mostly her words - almost all!), easier to read and easier to understand.

Tiap hari kita mulakan surah kehidupan dengan segala macam hal. Yang kena kerja rushing to get to work, rushing to get things ready before going to work, yang tak kerja lain hal pulak, all the rushings tetap ada. Perlu tak perlu, another story. Pendek kata, segala mala yang hidup ni akan ada surah kehidupan masing-masing, surah yang bermacam-macam. Enjoy tak enjoy belakang kira. Kalau berkat, amanah, redha, berlapang hati dalam segala hal, insyaallah elok dan indah lah perjalanan hidup kita.

Di sepanjang kehidupan ini, kita akan jumpa manusia yang bermacam-macam hal. Ada yang baik, yang immediately kita rasa boleh dijadikan idola! Ada yang perangai caca-merba, hidup pun jadi caca-merba. Macam-macam kerenah kita tengok. Dalam setiap langkah kehidupan akan ada iktibar, ada pengajaran, depending on how we look at things. Actually, manusia ni memang macam-macam! Kita cerita sikit chronology satay .... betapa kejamnya manusia, sampai binatang tak berdosa diproses jadi satay, jadi mincemeat, jadi burger ... belum dengar lagi binatang proses manusia jadi burger, jadi satay. Kalau adapun, ada binatang yang makan manusia mentah-mentah, tapi lepas tu kalau nasib tak baik, dia kena tembak oleh manusia yang bukan mangsanya, manusia yang tak kena dimamah olehnya. Manusia yang tembak binatang tu, sihat walafiat, tak disentuh pun oleh binatang tu ... paling-paling pun kena gigit nyamuk atau semut je. Macam kes ayam, kesian kat ayam tu... dah la kena sembelih, kena siat, kena potong-potong, direbus, dimasak sampai lembik, bercerai isi dari tulang, macam mayat-mayat mangsa Polpot la pulak dan dimamah oleh manusia. Siapa yang kejam, akal siapa yang teruk, manusia seperti binatang ke, binatang macam manusia. Setahu aku, binatang selalu kalah dengan manusia. Segarang-garang harimau, ditembak dari jauh oleh manusia, boleh mati. Siapa yang kejam?

Anyway, cerita pasal kehidupan kita ni memang tak habis. Mimpi cinderella, mimpi hantu, mimpi tak jadi kenyataan, mimpi tinggal mimpi, pengorbanan yang tak dibalas, semua tu part and parcel of our life. Kadang-kadang kita saja yang tahu yang whatever yang kita buat tu adalah satu pengorbanan, sedangkan recipient pengorbanan kita tu akan sentiasa rasa itu adalah tanggungjawab kita.... paling cun ... dah takdir, dah qada' dan qadar... dan bila ego dah menguasai diri, tak tau nak salah siapa, guna agama sebagai alasan. Macam satu artikel yang aku baca, ada orang pi Mekah buat haji, agen tu tak betul-betul buat arrangement, bila terjadi masaalah, depa kata, apa nak buat, memang la ini dugaan di Mekah, dugaan sama ada kita boleh sabar ke tidak, dugaan kuat ke tidak iman kita. Oooihh, pasal apa nak heret iman dan dugaan ke dalam kesilapan manusia yang tidak merancang terlebih dahulu dengan baik. Betul tak? Selalunya begitu lah. Bila tak mau salahkan diri sendiri, kita tuding jari dekat ayat al-quran, tuding jari kat hadis, tuding jari kat fatwa fatwi. Walhal dalam Islam, segala urusan mesti dibuat dengan sebaiknya. Dari perancangan awal hingga akhir .... mesti dibuat dengan cara military precision. Kalau baca dan kaji sirah-sirah Nabi pun, boleh dicontohi macam mana para nabi dan sahabat membuat perancangan rapi dalam segala hal - masa perang, masa nak lari dari musuh, strategi dakwah, strategi ekonomi dan segala adab peraturan kehidupan seharian - tidur, makan, minum. Tak ada pun kita dengar Nabi salahkan Tuhan atau ayat-ayat yang diturunkan. Hari tu ada orang kena tegur dengan aku pasal dia kata dia tak pergi satu tempat sebab nanti payah nak solat. Aiitt.. bumi ni kepunyaan Allah swt. Dia yang perintahkan kita solat, kalau rasa payah, Dia tak akan perintahkan kita, betul tak? Lalu aku lecture hamba Allah ni, jangan sebut susah nak solat, itu bunyi macam salahkan Allah swt yang telah menyusahkan hidup kita. Sebenarnya kita yang malas nak usaha nak cari masa dan tempat untuk solat... lepas tu salahkan keadaan, tak ada bilik solat la, tak ada masjid la, traffik jam la, majlis terlalu lama, tak sempat la... Macam tu lah lebih kurang bab salah menyalah ni. Blaming everything around us, except ourself!

Dalam hidup ni, kita sentiasa ada persepsi tentang macam-macam. Memang jadi tugas kita to remind each other, sebab kita semua tak perfect. Kita, kalau tak dibendung, kalau tak dikuatkan ikatan persaudaraan, kalau tak ambil peduli masaalah each other, hidup dan persepsi kita tentang segalanya akan sentiasa diulit oleh sindrom "sinetron". Kita akan selalu ingat yang bila permulaan susah, ending akan happy, bila orang jahat, sure ending kena tangkap atau kena bunuh, bila kecik2 miskin, sure bila besar boleh jadi businessman .... tapi tu hanya dalam "sinetron". Dalam realiti kehidupan tak macam tu. Layar dan perjalanan hidup kita hanya untuk tontonan kita. Kita pengarah, kita pelakon, kita la penonton. Kalau bukan kita yang lakarkan hidup kita untuk jadi senang dan tenang, memang tak akan ada siapa lagi yang boleh buat. Biarlah kita melakar dan mengarah hidup kita berpandukan ilmu dan agama. Kalau biarkan orang lain mengarah dan melakarkan hidup kita, memang la boleh jadi "sinetron"! Hmmmm.... any loopholes here?

Just sharing my thoughts and feelings and hope things will be better for all of us in many2 more years to come. No need to worry, no need to ponder about the past.... plan life ahead, give ourselves chance to sparkle.... again and again. Alhamdulillah.

Sis, salam rindu from me. We grew up together, shared all our dreams together, me running to you with my ups and downs. You are always there....thank you. Love you always....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Try baca....



Got this in my e-mail. Puas cuba dok baca. Faham tapi tegeliat la lidah. Maklumla, aku kan orang Kedah. And definitely this is not my lingo.... Anyway, enjoy reading ..... (letih buat keje, rest kejap...)

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Mamat rase malassang nök bangung tiddo. Nye gulling-gulling atah katil. Pusing kiri, pusing kanang. Serba dök kene dia berase. Mök Lijöh blèbèr hanyaar kot luör pitu, “Mat! Matahari nök tinggi galöh döh nim, ka’ak rezeki kalu bangung lèwat-lèwat. Mung tak dök kheje ke ari nim?”Dök tahang kene blèbèr Mamat Ppayang pong bikah bangung ceggat dari katil. Baru dia teringat pukol 11 ada kene wat kheje sikit hök Böh dia suroh kemarèng. Mamat pong jungaa tangang dia ambèk tuala. Pèsèngang mandi P. Ramlee pulök pagi nim, al maklunglah pukol 10.30 döh. Dari Manir nök jembe ke Jalang Batah Baru tu jauh jugök. Pah tu nök kena bereti stèsèng minyok Petronah pulök dekat sipang trapik lait Pulau Musang. Döp ingat starang nok tamböh minyök kemarèng. Dök dang 10 minit Mamat siap belake döh. Minung air kopi-ö setegök dua lepah tu pakaa kasut kulit atah tangge kak lambo. Baru beli minggu lepah tu kasut tu. Bekilat ssiö! Lepah tu Mamat pong stak möto vroooooong hale ke bandö. Mötosika sèkèng hèng jer, tapi boleh tahang lah.Jalang Batah Baru ader banyök bangunang jabbat dengang kedaa. Kalu hale ke depang sikit ada kedaa Astro, hök tv kene bayö bulang-bulang tu. Kalu tebèng dök bayö jer kena pötöng hanyaar. Lepah pada suraa Flat Batah Baru tu ada lèrèk kedaa èkong. Kedaa makang pong ada gök. Kalu jallang sikit lagi sebelum kedaa Astro tu, ada kawasang lapang tepat juaa khète baru cap Hyundaa dengang Kia.Di antara kedaa èkong dengang kedaa Astro tu ada celöh-celöh tu jabbat löyar baru buka. Pèsèngang baru pah jadi löyar tu Mamat mari mmkir sörrang. Slo-slo Mamat naèk tikat dua. Napök gaye ader dua örang jer kherani. Llaki sörang, ppuang sörang. Boleh tahang hök ppuang tu. Tapi pakaa cicing molèk ngak kat jari manih tu. Ttunang döh pèsèngang tu.. Dök napök gambö starang. Berat nnanang. Mamat kabö ke kherani ppuang tu dia nök jjuper Tuang Löyar. Hayat hidup Mamat dök rajing jjuper löyar skali habuk. Cakkak dengang löyar jauh skali.. Nye mari debö wèh.Mamat pong ketok pitu masok. Löyar tu tengöh pegang gagang talipung cap Panasonic kat telinga dia. Wayar talipung tu tengöh beseranggöh lagi. “I dah uruskan fixed deposit you sebanyak RM10 juta tu. Lagi satu, minggu depan ni, I nak you ikut I ke Singapore. HSBC Singapore dah buat arrangement untuk finance syarikat klien I, tak banyak, dalam 20 juta Sing dollar. Firm I jadi lawyer jugak tu. I turun KL minggu ni, kita dinner kat Shook di Starhill ok?”Mamat bukang pandaa sangat cakak orang putih. Tapi bila dengö haa pitih die pahang. Mainang apa juta-juta nim? Mamat mari mmikir.Löyar muder tu pong letök gagang talipung sambil-sambil kheling ujung mata tengök ke Mamat. “Yer, nök mender? Saya sibuk sangat ni, dök tengök ker?” löyar tu tanye Mamat.Mamat pucat kesi. Dök tahu nök kata mende. Nök jawak salöh. Tak mboh jawak salöh. Macang mase nök bangung tiddo sakning. Serbe dök kene. Sudöhhang Mamat tebèng jugök jawak.“Sebenörnyer tuang, sayer nim kheje dengang sarikat Teleköng. Saya mari nok sambung wayar talipung hök tuang wak lölök cakkak sakning. Dök sambung lagi wayar tu, guaner lah tuang boleh cakkak döh!”Muka tuang löyar tu jadi biru hèrang!Döh nök wat guana starang! Nök èksèng dök betepat! Ada jugök löyar kècèk orang dèh! Pecöh bo! Orang jamang lenim kata “kantoi”!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Without geography, you are nowhere"

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Gathering..... I was there, at last.....





It has been a while since I last update. Had been so tied up at work. Left home immediately after fajr prayer and balik definitely after isyak. Everyday... And back at home with house work, home work, home duty, semua ada. Letih is the word. Yes, finally the announcement of whatever transition, whatever restructuring the company had been planning had been made. All the corridor talks, boardroom talks, coffeeshop talks, market talks was now for real. Like it or not, it was real! Yup, i was affected... Come June, will be new things for me, new set of people to meet, to work with. Same boss though.... Had been in the management/admin/hr area all my working life. Well, i am happy? All I can say for now is, syukur alhamdulillah.... I still have a job. Feelings? Mixed feelings actually .... got to learn new things in the new business area. Insyaallah....

This is an overdue posting. Supposedly posted last week. Tak pa, pepatah "it's better late than never" applies here! I finally went to a gathering of old friends last May 1st. Old means 'lama', not 'tua' ok. I said 'finally' because I have been missing all the gatherings that was done over the years. Opps... I went once... at Shaolin's place. Tu pun dah lama. Ok, let's cerita ceriti a little bit about this gathering. Done at Tina's place in Sunway Kayangan. Drove there with my two sidekicks who normally followed me wherever I go. Kira macam bayang2 la ni. Just ikut the address given, and miraculously, tak sesat. Ngah (Zaini) & Chik (Fuzy) were already there when we arrived. Tuan rumah (Tina) memang la ada, sebok dok 'membakar' steaks & chops. So western! And there started all the screams, the giggles, the laughs, and I felt young again!! Norita, Kak Syim, Kak We, Kak Jee, Jan, Alinda & her three girls were also there. Macam-macam cerita, macam-macam gossip, the serious, the lawak... cerita baru, cerita lama. And the updates of those known to us all. Yup, we had fun. I had fun! My two girls macam pening tengok we all. Mana tak pening, tak tau nak follow cerita sapa. Was there dari dekat-dekat pukul satu sampai pukul lima. Tu pun sebab tuan rumah ada function/event she has got to handle, so kami kena la berundur. Nasib baik dia ada hal, kalau tak, entah2 masih kat situ sampai maghrib kot! Anyway, it was an interesting meet. The girls, opps... ladies masih cun macam dulu-dulu. Food? Nice, all western, all the chops, name it, almost semua ada.... then ada cakes, brownies, kueh melayu pun ada. Everything is nice, the food and more importantly the company. Wish I can do this more often. Being young once was nice, but feeling young and carefree at this 'age' is more nicer..... alhamdulillah. Thanks, Tina for being a good host ... may Allah bless you always. Ngah, Chik, Norita and the rest, we'll meet again, insyaAllah.



After Tina's place, me and my girls, off we drove to Putrajaya (Alamanda). Hujan lebat all the way. Solat asar and maghrib in Alamanda. Beli groceries then balik. Why in Alamanda? Jauh tu.... I don't actually have the answer. Just that I love to drive jauh2 with the girls (boleh bagi ceramah free kat dia orang dalam kereta and they had no choice but to listen!). On the way home, berhenti solat isyak at Masjid Putrajaya. Hubby called from Kuching couple of times. Hairan dia, sampai malam we all tak balik-balik rumah lagi. Last lap of the 'merayau session', singgah Pelita SS2 beli dinner. Then off we balik....

A whole day outing.... tiring but definitely a nice one.


"A true friend walks in when the whole world walks out"

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Allah knows best ..............



Had been so busy, terribly busy. The organisation is undergoing a massive restructuring. What has it got to do with me? Hmmm.... knock hard on the head to bring out the answer. Yes, it does affect my position in one way or another. In the mean time, I just hope for the best. What I want may not be the best. Kita plan, macam-macam dok ting tong dalam kepala, wishing we get what we want. But at the end of the day, only Allah has the answer - because He knows what is best. Whatever that comes, syukur alhamdulillah....

Long weekend starting esok. Office tutup coz Saturday is a public holiday, so replacement leave is tomorrow. Yay!! At least I can do some banking stuff and pay bills. Income tax baru submit tadi - e-filing. Lega. Ni last minute punya kerja la ni. Bukan apa, saja simpan kot2 before the closing date terjumpa pula bil2 yang boleh digunakan untuk tax exemption. Mana tau. To be honest, tak jumpa apa2pun. Had to submit exactly as was drafted more than a month ago!

My plan for the weekend? Hmmm.... macam-macam. Hubby will be travelling tomorrow to Kuching, balik Sunday. Saturday plan is to go to a small gathering at a friend's place in Sunway Kayangan, insyaallah. Dah lama sungguh tak jumpa this set of friends, kawan-kawan lama masa di ITM Arau. When we were there, campus tu masih dalam hutan kebun getah. Macam2 yang kami lalui dulu. But it was fun. Over the years, these girls selalu jumpa each other, cuma aku selalu tak berpeluang tak join. Insyaallah, I will try to make it this time around. Dengar kata, they all siap nak ada dress code - black and white... ala-ala michael jackson gitu. Ok juga, safe colour...

Visiting mak is out of question this weekend. She will be going back to Alor Star with my sis. Rindu kat rumah dia and her friends, I suppose. Since my sis boleh ambil cuti (finally!), she and the husband dengan rela hati plan dengan mak. Happy dia.... alhamdulillah. But I will miss this sister of mine, miss the free lunch every Sunday! We will meet almost every Sunday for lunch. Selalunya they all belanja, tu yang best. Tak pa la, next time aku belanja... ok, Puan Syahrimi? I will miss their company, that's definite. The chit-chatting, cerita serious, cerita mengarut.

Wish for a good and restful weekend, insyaallah. And wishing all - selamat menyambut hari buruh / hari pekerja. Jadilah pekerja dan buruh yang mithali.... I have been trying to be one, alhamdulillah....

Love this piece. Let share ....

ALLAH KNOWS BEST
Allah knows what's best for us, so why should we complain
We always want sunshine
But he knows there must be rain
We always want laughter, and the merriment of cheer
But our heart will lose their tenderness, if we never shed a tear
Allah tests us often with sufferings and with sorrows
He tests us not to punish us, but to help us meet tomorrow
For growing trees are strengthened, if they can withstand the storm
And the sharpness of the chisel, gave the marble its grace and form
Allah tests us often
And for every pain He gives us
Provided we are patient, is followed by rich gain
So whenever we feel that everything is going wrong
Remember....
It is just Allah's way to make our spirit strong.
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"Who-so-ever is in the heavens and on earth begs of Him. Every days He has a matter to bring forth [such as giving honor to some, disgrace to some, life to some, death to some, etc]. {Qur'an 55:29}

Friday, April 16, 2010

A call to reflect ..........


"All Praise is due to Allah; we begin with His name and turn to Him in all of the tests He puts forward to strengthen us. May He shower peace and blessings upon Muhammad,the Seal of the Prophets,his family, Companions, and those who follow his way until the Day of Judgment. All praise is due to Allah, Who always hears the prayer and du`aa' (supplication) of those who call upon Him. May we continue to seek His guidance and His pleasure in all our actions, and continue to be guided to do that which is pleasing to Him."

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A Woman's Reflection on Leading Prayer
by Yasmin Mogahed
13 April 2010

On March 18, 2005, Amina Wadud led the first female-led jum`ah (Friday) prayer. On that day, women took a huge step towards being more like men. But did we come closer to actualizing our God-given liberation?

I don’t think so.

What we so often forget is that God has honored the woman by giving her value in relation to God—not in relation to men. But as Western feminism erases God from the scene, there is no standard left—except men. As a result, the Western feminist is forced to find her value in relation to a man. And in so doing, she has accepted a faulty assumption. She has accepted that man is the standard, and thus a woman can never be a full human being until she becomes just like a man.

When a man cut his hair short, she wanted to cut her hair short. When a man joined the army, she wanted to join the army. She wanted these things for no other reason than because the “standard” had it.

What she didn’t recognize was that God dignifies both men and women in their distinctiveness – not their sameness. And on March 18, Muslim women made the very same mistake.

For 1400 years there has been a consensus of the scholars that men are to lead prayer. As a Muslim woman, why does this matter? The one who leads prayer is not spiritually superior in any way. Something is not better just because a man does it. And leading prayer is not better, just because it’s leading. Had it been the role of women or had it been more divine, why wouldn’t the Prophet Muhammad s.a.w have asked Ayesha or Khadija, or Fatima—the greatest women of all time—to lead? These women were promised heaven—and yet they never led prayer.

But now, for the first time in 1400 years, we look at a man leading prayer and we think, “That’s not fair.” We think so although God has given no special privilege to the one who leads. The imam is no higher in the eyes of God than the one who prays behind.

On the other hand, only a woman can be a mother. And God has given special privilege to a mother. The Prophet Muhammad s.a.w taught us that heaven lies at the feet of mothers. But no matter what a man does he can never be a mother. So why is that not unfair?

When asked, “Who is most deserving of our kind treatment?” the Prophet ﷺ replied, “Your mother” three times before saying “your father” only once. Is that sexist? No matter what a man does he will never be able to have the status of a mother.

And yet, even when God honors us with something uniquely feminine, we are too busy trying to find our worth in reference to men to value it—or even notice. We, too, have accepted men as the standard; so anything uniquely feminine is, by definition, inferior. Being sensitive is an insult, becoming a mother—a degradation. In the battle between stoic rationality (considered masculine) and selfless compassion (considered feminine), rationality reigns supreme.

As soon as we accept that everything a man has and does is better, all that follows is a knee-jerk reaction: if men have it, we want it too. If men pray in the front rows, we assume this is better, so we want to pray in the front rows too. If men lead prayer, we assume the imam is closer to God, so we want to lead prayer too. Somewhere along the line we’ve accepted the notion that having a position of worldly leadership is some indication of one’s position with God.

A Muslim woman does not need to degrade herself in this way. She has God as a standard. She has God to give her value; she doesn’t need a man.

In fact, in our crusade to follow men, we as women never even stopped to examine the possibility that what we have is better for us. In some cases we even gave up what was higher only to be like men.

Fifty years ago, society told us that men were superior because they left the home to work in factories. We were mothers. And yet, we were told that it was women’s liberation to abandon the raising of another human being in order to work on a machine. We accepted that working in a factory was superior to raising the foundation of society—just because a man did it.

Then, after working, we were expected to be superhuman—the perfect mother, the perfect wife, the perfect homemaker—and have the perfect career. And while there is nothing wrong, by definition, with a woman having a career, we soon came to realize what we had sacrificed by blindly mimicking men. We watched as our children became strangers and soon recognized the privilege we’d given up.

And so only now—given the choice—women in the West are choosing to stay home to raise their children. According to the United States Department of Agriculture, only 31 percent of mothers with babies, and 18 percent of mothers with two or more children, are working full-time. And of those working mothers, a survey conducted by Parenting Magazine in 2000, found that 93% of them say they would rather be at home with their kids, but are compelled to work due to ‘financial obligations.’ These ‘obligations’ are imposed on women by the gender sameness of the modern West, and removed from women by the gender distinctiveness of Islam.

It took women in the West almost a century of experimentation to realize a privilege given to Muslim women 1400 years ago.

Given my privilege as a woman, I only degrade myself by trying to be something I’m not – and in all honesty – don’t want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach true liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and value the beauty in our own God-given distinctiveness.

If given a choice between stoic justice and compassion, I choose compassion. And if given a choice between worldly leadership and heaven at my feet—I choose heaven.

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A well-written article on us ....women, describing what we are experiencing. May ALLAH help us in facing this modern life challenges and provide us patience, strength, knowledge and wisdom in building “the foundation of society” in the way He prescribed us to do while also working. We definitely need His help in every single moment.

The article above is really a call to reflect. Especially this – “If given a choice between stoic justice and compassion, I choose compassion. And if given a choice between worldly leadership and heaven at my feet—I choose heaven.”

So why am I still here working ...... the question that will never leave me.... and something that leaves us all to ponder about. The answer lies within us.

However, in another perspective, it may not be the “working” that make us fall short in “effectively” raising our children. It may be our faith, our knowledge, our passion or our strength. Without the good & right “intelligences” and competencies, staying home may also make us ineffective in building “the foundation of society”.

Wallahu'alam.

Note : Special thanks to a dear friend and a sister, Fairuzlina for sending me this article and also many others. May Allah bless her always.

~~ Allah is very Gracious and Kind to His slaves ~~ {Qu'ran 42:19}

Thursday, April 15, 2010

A dedication ..... memory of yesteryears .....



The Windmills of Your Mind

Round, like a circle in a spiral
Like a wheel within a wheel
Never ending or beginning
On an ever spinning wheel
Like a snowball down a mountain
Or a carnival balloon
Like a carousel that's turning
Running rings around the moon

Like a clock whose hands are sweeping
Past the minutes on its face
And the world is like an apple
Whirling silently in space
Like the circles that you find
In the windmills of your mind

Like a tunnel that you follow
To a tunnel of its own
Down a hollow to a cavern
Where the sun has never shone
Like a door that keeps revolving
In a half forgotten dream
Or the ripples from a pebble
Someone tosses in a stream

Like a clock whose hands are sweeping
Past the minutes on its face
And the world is like an apple
Whirling silently in space
Like the circles that you find
In the windmills of your mind

Keys that jingle in your pocket
Words that jangle in your head
Why did summer go so quickly
Was it something that you said
Lovers walk along the shore
Leave their footprints in the sand
Is the sound of distant drumming
Just the fingers of your hand

Pictures hanging in the hallway
And a fragment of a song
Half remembered names and faces
But to whom do they belong
When you knew that it was over
In the autumn of goodbyes
For a moment
You could not recall the color of his eyes

Like a circle in a spiral
Like a wheel within a wheel
Never ending or beginning
On an ever spinning wheel
As the images unwind
Like the circles that you find
In the windmills of your mind....

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I love this song. It brings back the memories of my growing up years, especially in my teens. This became our fav song, me, my eldest sis and my bestest friend, my other sis. This may not be the original, but it was just as beautiful. It was so beautiful and understated, the melody, the arrangement. It brought back the great feelings and the special meanings.... Could not remember how we stumbled across this song, could it be over my grandpa's old radio or from some cassette we found, pun tak ingat how and from where. And to both my sis who grew up together with me liking this song, this is specially dedicated to you. And I am definitely missing our sweet childish days.......... again, now matter how long ago it has been.

"The older I grow the more earnestly I feel that the few joys of childhood are the best that life has to give." ~ Ellen Glasgow